Luke: Mom, if a tree grew up underneath my bed, would it push the bed up, or break the bed into pieces?
Me: I think it would push the bed up.
Luke: No, I think it would break it into pieces.
Daddy: What's wrong, Jack? You don't like having your diaper changed?
Jack: (Grabs pacifier out of mouth and throws it aside.) Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga!